Research has found that people who receive appreciative emails feel much more grateful than is generally realized – they love getting such gratitude, even being “ecstatic” when they receive one. When you write appreciative emails – so easy and effective to do – you will find they create benefits for you as well – like a feeling of greater wellbeing.
People under-estimate the positive feelings such responses bring, according to researchers quoted in the 2018 New York Times article, “You Should Actually Send That Thank You Note You’ve Been Meaning to Write.” People also over-estimate the extent to which such notes might appear insincere or might make the recipient feel uncomfortable.
The study findings, published in the journal Psychological Science, were based on short “gratitude letters” to a person who had affected the sender in some way, for example, people who had offered guidance through job searches and tough times. Most letters took less than 5 minutes to write. Most recipients cared about the warmth of the attitude expressed rather than how well the words were written.
The overall finding: people tend to undervalue the positive effect they can have on others by spending even a very short time on writing appreciative notes.
The researchers quoted in the New York Times found from the study that:
People tended to under-estimate the value of sending such a note to another person. Also, many seemed concerned with how much their writing would be scrutinized. [Perhaps they think the recipient will be a bit suspicious about this change of approach.]
Gratitude communication is now a field of study in which academics analyze the best ways to express thanks. Psychologists have found correlations between gratitude and improved physical and mental health, empathy, and even sleep quality. Your gratitude wins trust and respect from others. What’s more, when influential people do it, the results are powerful, according to experts.
Image, right: Douglas Conant, former CEO of Campbell Soup.
The best known example of gratitude behavior is Douglas Conant, former CEO of the Campbell Soup Company (annual revenue US$7 billion+ and around 17,000+ employees worldwide), who sent 30,000 handwritten thank-you notes to employees, among many other management initiatives, during his 10 years as chief.
Conant said expressing gratitude was a key to turning around the company, which was struggling when he took over. As an introvert, he found this a powerful way to reach out to many employees in its international network.
Conant said managers tend to focus on fixing what’s broken and forget to celebrate successes. So he started writing 10-20 thank-you notes each day to company staff, by hand, during his train ride home, according to the Philadelphia Enquirer:
I wanted them to know it was from me, that I was personally paying attention. What I found is, the more I say ‘Thank you for a job well done,’ the more engaged the people I work with become; the more they celebrate the contributions of their peers.”
His number one tip is to mean it when you thank others. “People can tell when you don’t,” he said.
Apparently Mark Zuckerberg of Facebook is another devotee of thank-you notes. In 2014, Zuckerberg challenged himself to handwrite one thank-you note per day, according to the Washington Post. (Not sure how well he succeeded!)
You can briefly follow this sequence in a thank-you note (handwritten or emailed) or in a person-to-person presentation:
Everyone wants to feel they are valued, to see themselves in a positive light. This is a fundamental human motivation proven by research. People are prepared to contribute more if they feel they are achieving something worthwhile. You can read more about 8 magic words that workers love to hear. You can say this in person, or write appreciative emails, or write handwritten notes. Make that contact specifically to the person you want to communicate with. NEVER write an appreciative note via internal or external social media! You will undo your good work because that channel is not personal.
I am a huge supporter of employee recognition, and have introduced these programs into various organizations. The above recipe shows how you can simply express your appreciation to your peers and to the people who report to you in the workplace. If you want to find out more on how and when to recognize employees for good work, my ebook on employee recognition explains how to implement this fabulous activity in your workplace or in your whole organization.
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